Hi everyone, remember me?
I’m here to tell you that I have just been diagnosed (by myself no less) with LPOM Syndrome and I have but an hour left to live.
Presenting with a spring in my step and careless abandon of notes, Last Paper On Monday Syndrome is evident. Other signs and symptoms include somnolence, delusion of finals completion, absence of pre-existing palpitations, excessive relaxation and incessant chatter.
The prognosis is pretty bad.
Since LPOM is a self-limiting condition, I have no choice but to ride it out. There are no established pharmacological or non-pharmacological treatments available. Hourly monitoring of vital signs and assessments of psychological condition have been ordered and will be carried out with no vigilance whatsoever.
Wish me luck.
- see you guys on monday -